No Question Left Behind: Teens Helping Teens

Conversion, Confession, Celebration!

2011-11-28T15:05:00.001-05:00

Teen Summer: What to Do, What to Avoid

2010-05-24T04:13:00.003-04:00

Q: What do teenagers do during the summer? I was hoping maybe you could give me a few hints as to what I should be looking for and what to avoid. A little advice would go a long way right now. Thank you in advance.

A: Well first off, I don’t think there’s any set activities that teens have to do during the summer! It really depends on the individual. I myself enjoy just hanging with friends, maybe at their house or the youth center in my town. I also enjoy the occasional game of tennis or golf, but that’s just me. I would say just do what you enjoy doing. Another tip is to get involved in your youth group, if your town or parish has an active one. They’ll certainly give you more ways to spend your time.

As for what you should avoid, I could say the obvious (drinking, drugs, etc.), but that would be of little use to you. Avoid relationships that aren’t genuine. By that I mean don’t lower your standards just to make more “friends”. It’s a mistake I’ve seen plenty of people make, and it always leads to that individual feeling used, unloved, and depressed. This is the type of “friend” that leads people to making bad decisions like the ones I listed above. Make sure you have friends that will stay with you no matter what, help you in your times of need, and most importantly respect you for who you are. I am fortunate enough to have such friends, and believe me, it’s the only way to go. They make it difficult for me to ever not find anything to do during the summer!

Enjoy your summer!

Tyler

My Mom Treats Me Like a Child

2010-04-21T05:40:00.002-04:00

Q: My mom treats me like a kid even though I am 14. I think that she needs to loosen up. She tells me that I can’t wear certain clothes and doesn’t let me wear makeup. Should I put up with it or talk to her?

A: Fourteen is a rough age for many people. With high school comes a lot of new pressures – get good grades, have new experiences, strive for popularity. However, fourteen is also difficult for those of us watching you go through that difficult time. I remember being terrified when my sister went through middle school and into high school, because I hated the idea of seeing her make the mistakes and experience the heartbreaks that I had. Parents are the same way, especially mothers. Fourteen is an interesting age, because you're no longer a child, and yet not quite an adult – you are able to make some decisions on your own, but still rely on your parents for support. As such, you still need to respect their decisions and realize that they may disagree with you for good reasons.

My advice is to talk with your mom (in an adult-like manner, with no screaming or whining), and maybe try to come to some form of compromise over what clothes or makeup you can and cannot wear. Most importantly, listen to her and try to understand where she is coming from. Despite what we think, mothers want nothing but the best for us, so try to keep that in mind. No matter how the conversation ends up, what mom says goes (there’s that Fourth Commandment again), but hopefully by talking it over with her you’ll have a better understanding of why she won’t let you. And who knows, maybe you just might agree!

Maureen D.

Just Friends

2010-04-19T05:32:00.003-04:00

Q: Can two people of the opposite sex be close friends without being intimate?

A: Yes, people of the opposite sex can be friends without being intimate. Many are actually best friends and nothing ever develops into a physical relationship. However, one must be careful about what they say and do in the presence of the other person to keep things at a friendship level. There is a fine line between intimate and “just friends.” Not all people are able to succeed in such friendships. Ask God to help if you are struggling in such a situation.

Jenna

Is Catholics Belief in the Real Presence Cannibalism?

2010-04-16T05:25:00.000-04:00

Q: How do I explain to a non-Catholic Christian that the Eucharist is not cannibalism?

A: You can explain to a non-Catholic Christian that the Eucharist is not cannibalism by first explaining each of the two parts separately, at first, and then together. What we must first do is explain the Eucharist by saying that in the Eucharist Christ's Body is truly and substantially present in a supernatural, not in a natural way. It is the same as in the Last Supper when Christ changed the substance of the bread and wine, but not its form, into His Flesh and Blood. So, the form of the Eucharist, which does not change, is bread and wine.

Then, you must answer the question of cannibalism. Cannibalism is to eat food, but not just any food. For it to be cannibalism the form of the food has to be meat and / or blood of one’s own species. Since the form of the Eucharist is not meat or blood it cannot be cannibalism. The determining factor is the form of the food. If a person eats a dead man, that would be cannibalism. If, on the other hand, a lion nourishes himself by eating several people, and then a month later a hunter comes along and kills and eats that lion, that would not be cannibalism.

Karen

Catholics Going to Non-Catholic Churches

2010-04-14T17:14:00.001-04:00

Q: My best friend and I like to spend the night at each other’s houses a lot. If she spends the night at my house on Saturday then she goes to church with my family on Sunday. But if I spend the night at her house on Saturday, my parents won’t let me go to church with her family because she isn’t Catholic. I don’t see what the big deal is; church is church.

A: If that is the rule, then you should respect your parents. The Protestant church service doesn't fulfill our Sunday obligation as Catholics. They don't have the Eucharist. The rule around my house (because I have a lot of Protestant friends) was that I had to go to my church first, fulfill my obligation, and then I could go to my friend’s church. You should also be able to defend your faith if you are ever put into a situation at your friend’s church that would call you to.

Ashley

Up Against Peer Pressure

2010-04-12T05:09:00.000-04:00

Q: Can you tell me some possible ways to defend yourself against peer pressure?

A: Set firm standards for yourself and create a reputation based on them. Find a friend who shares the same morals as you and create a “buddy system.” Keep each other in line with the standards you have set.

Accountability plays a huge role in peer pressure situations. Check up on each other from time to time and offer support.

Jenna

Do Aborted Babies Go to Heaven?

2010-04-09T05:51:00.000-04:00

Q: Do aborted babies go to heaven? I heard someone say once that aborted babies are “baptized in blood.”

A: Yes, aborted babies do go to heaven. Baptism of blood or the baptism of desire is given to those who through no fault of their own have not received the Sacrament of Baptism (baptism of water). Baptism of blood is given to those who lived a good life and died in Christ’s name. Baptism of desire is given to those who would have belonged to the Catholic Church if they had known. (James Drummey, Catholic Replies [C. R. Publications, 1992], pg.93)

We believe that babies are saved because it is not their own imperfection that has caused them no chance of being part of God’s Church. We entrust them to the mercy of God. (CCC 1261)

Jenna

Can I Get New Godparents?

2010-04-07T05:41:00.002-04:00

Q: My godparents were practicing Catholics when I was baptized. They are divorced now and not practicing the Faith. I pray that they will come back to the Faith every night. Can I get new godparents?

A: No, you can't. I think the best thing you can do is to continue praying for your godparents. Instead of looking to get new godparents, you can talk to them about it, and trust that God will bring them back to Him.

Tom

Jars of Clay: Drummer Boy

2009-12-24T19:41:00.000-05:00

Video Games Evil?

2009-11-23T05:08:00.001-05:00

Q: I would like to know if it's okay to play a video game that has wizards in it. A person gets powers, etc. for getting certain objects. The game is mostly action and a person mostly wouldn’t know this unless they read the theme of the game. This might seem like a silly question, but I was wondering.

A: The main problem with this is that the Church teaches that magic, sorcery, and related superstitions are wrong. On the surface, this doesn’t make it wrong to play a video game involving wizards. However, you have to be very careful not to let such games influence you in the wrong way. The Catechism of the Catholic Church teaches, “Users should practice moderation and discipline in their approach to the mass media. They will want to form enlightened and correct consciences the more easily to resist unwholesome influences.” (CCC, 2496) Basically, that means that if you’re frequently exposed to what might be a bad influence, you might be less inclined to think it wrong if it came up in real life.

So while there’s nothing directly sinful about playing this sort of game by itself, it is a good idea to find another one.

Michael

Preaching in Public School

2009-11-20T05:25:00.001-05:00

Q: The Bible says that we should go out and spread the word of Jesus. But I go to public school and it is against the law to talk about Jesus in school. That isn’t freedom of religion. What do I do?

A: It is not against the law to spread the word of Jesus, however, tact is needed. You don’t need to broadcast it throughout the school, or make a television announcement about it. The easiest ways to spread the Word of God is by dropping small hints during conversation and by your own moral example. Sometimes it’s best to evangelize by just letting others watch how you act and have them realize what they’re missing. Forcing religion and God onto others often makes them turn away. You have to be kind, welcoming, and supportive. You have to make them interested; you have to show them how great it is to know God. As St. Francis said, “Preach the Gospel always and when necessary use words.”

Jenna

Catholics, the Elect, and Predestination

2009-11-18T05:36:00.002-05:00

Q: Would you please explain what the Catholic Church teaches about the Elect? I had a priest explain to me that the Church teaches predestination while Calvinistic Protestantism teaches double predestination. I’m confused. If God chooses before all time who is to be saved, where does free will come into play? It would seem fruitless to apply any effort into trying to live the Christian life if you are predestined to hell. No matter what, you’re out of luck. There is a biblical passage that basically says that none of the chosen will be snatched from God. This problem has been bothering me for some time now.

A: First let’s lay down some definitions:
Predestination: The doctrine that God specifically chose some to be saved before the creation of the world. Yet, God predestines no one to go to hell.

Double Predestination: The belief that God specifically chose some to spend their eternity in hell before the foundation of the world.

Predestination is a Catholic doctrine that has a solid base in Scripture, including the passage that you point out in your question, “and I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish, and no one shall snatch them out of my hand.” (Jn. 10:28) Other Scripture on this topic includes, Romans 8:29-30, Matthew 25:34, John 10:27, Acts 13:48, and Ephesians 1:4.

Our Sunday Visitor’s Catholic Encyclopedia states, “Predestination affirms that, as part of the eternal plan of divine providence, God has predetermined certain persons to eternal bliss.” The Blessed Mother is an example of someone who is predestined for heaven. Those of us who are not predestined to heaven, must choose heaven through our own free will.

However, there are forms of predestination that the Church completely rejects, including double predestination as taught by John Calvin. To believe in double predestination would in effect mean believing that we have no free will, and that we have no purpose in life. As you pointed out, there would be no point in avoiding sin, or even in living, because it has already been determined where we will spend eternity.

Whether we go to heaven or hell is our choice. We can either live a good Christian lifestyle and have a loving intimate relationship with God, or we can live our lives in sin. All we need to do is repent our sins and beg for forgiveness. Of course, that’s not to say that we can just live in sin, and then be sorry for them when we die. Striving for God’s goodness and rebuking evil will make it literally a million times easier for us, and those around us, to reach heaven.

Christian

Why is Catholic Church Against Gay Marriage

2009-11-16T05:47:00.000-05:00

Q: Why is the Catholic Church against gay marriage? I should have the freedom to marry whomever I want.

A: It’s evident that God created male and female to be joined together from the beginning of time. I think you should ask yourself this question: “If God intended for two females to be married (or two males) then why can’t they have children?” The Catholic Church has always recognized that marriage is between a man and a woman. Until recently all Christian churches and governments recognized this truth too.

Although we should be compassionate to our gay and lesbian brothers and sisters in Christ, we cannot accept or support their choice of sexual lifestyle. Nor should we have to compromise our moral values to allow them to legally marry, or for it to be recognized by the Church.

Ashley

Chastity Rome -- Chick Blues: Dawn Eden

2009-11-15T05:44:00.001-05:00

Wait for Me: Rebecca St. James

2009-11-14T05:21:00.000-05:00

Selling My Soul to the Devil

2009-11-13T05:33:00.000-05:00

Q: My mother is sick with cancer and I was having a bad day myself with a lot of problems going on and I said that if my problems would go away and my mother would get better that I would give the devil my soul. Is it really possible that I gave the devil my soul? If I did, is there anything I could do to get it back?

A: The devil tries to distract us, to con us, tempt us, and trick us from getting into heaven. Some people choose to ignore God’s call, while others choose to follow. Some people choose to follow a path of darkness. In this case, I don’t think you gave your soul to the devil; your soul belongs to God. We do not have the authority over our souls to place them into heaven or hell. We have the way we carry out our lives to show where we would like to end up, but the ultimate judgment lies with God alone.

Jesus Christ was crucified. He died, and rose from the dead to conquer all of our sins. If you think you have done something wrong (anything) you have the opportunity to repent through the Sacrament of Reconciliation. One of the most beautiful things with God is that no matter how badly we mess up, if we are truly sorry in our hearts and ask for forgiveness, God will grant it.

Alex

Jesus and Mary Magdalene Married

2009-11-06T05:46:00.000-05:00

Q: Was Mary Magdalene like Jesus’ girlfriend? There was a movie that showed Mary having Jesus’ children.

A: No, that is definitely a misunderstanding. Mary Magdalene was not Jesus’ girlfriend by any means. They were just close friends. Movies may try to portray them this way to make it more interesting, or they may do it in an attempt to corrupt the story. They are false for doing this. Refer to the Bible and what you have been taught through Tradition, not movies or Hollywood.

Jenna

Pentecostals, Hair, Makeup, Jewelry, and Dresses

2009-11-04T05:33:00.001-05:00

Q: I have a Pentecostal friend who says that women shouldn’t cut their hair, wear make-up, or wear jewelry, and that they should only wear dresses because of something in the Old Testament. Is that true?

A: This is not a teaching of the Catholic Church. Some denominations see things differently. Even though God and his teachings do not change, many things like this have to do with the Old Testament Jewish culture and customs. Culture and custom do change.

There is also the consideration of biblical translation. For example, Deuteronomy 22:5 reads, “A woman shall not wear anything that which pertains to a man, nor shall a man put on a woman’s garment: for whoever does these things is an abomination to the Lord your God.” Now, this passage doesn’t clearly prohibit pants on women, even though some Christian denominations say that it does. We need to also take into consideration the cultural time. The Hebrews wore a long, sleeved garment similar to a nightshirt. Pants didn’t appear for many centuries after Deuteronomy was written.

Tom

Roman Catholics

2009-11-02T05:14:00.001-05:00

Q: Are all Catholics Roman Catholics?

A: Yes and no. The phrase “Roman Catholic” can mean two things. Usually, it means a church that acknowledges the Pope as the leader of the Catholic Church on earth. A true Catholic Church is in union with the Pope in Rome – that’s where “Roman Catholic” comes from. Because of this, churches that have split off from the Vatican aren’t truly Catholic churches.

However, it can also refer to the liturgy the church uses in the Mass. In this sense, Roman Catholic means a church that celebrates the Mass with the Latin Rite liturgy. Some Catholic churches use different liturgies like the Byzantine, Coptic, or Chaldean liturgies. (Just to name a few.)

This means that they celebrate the Mass differently than you’re probably used to. In most other rites, they don't call it “the Mass.” They call it “the liturgy” or “qurbana” or something else, depending on the traditional language. The ritual has all the same essential elements as the Mass – Bible readings, Eucharistic prayer, and Holy Communion – but the prayers will often use different words (and sometimes different languages). In some Eastern Rites, the priest offers the entire Eucharistic prayer behind closed doors. In still other rites, the liturgy includes a lot more Bible readings than you'll find in the average Latin Rite Mass.

These churches may call themselves “Byzantine Catholics” or something else instead of “Roman Catholics” but as long as they look to the Pope for authority, that’s okay.

Basically, a true Roman Catholic Church is a church that acknowledges the Pope as the visible leader of the Catholic Church on earth and obeys what he says. Some Catholic churches that have different ways of saying Mass call themselves something different than “Roman Catholic,” but that’s all okay as long as they’re “Roman Catholic” in that they’re in union with Rome.

Michael

Choosing and Paying for College

2009-09-21T05:21:00.002-04:00

Today, we're taking a little break from the usual Q&A to bring you a special announcement.

If you're starting to think about college then you'll want to check out Catholic Colleges Month. It's hosted by Homeschool Connections but is open to everyone, teens and parents, who want to know more about choosing and paying for college.

This is a series of free webinars on college topics from How to Pay for College Without Breaking the Bank to meet & greets with several great Catholic colleges and more.

Dealing With My Parent's Divorce

2009-09-18T04:43:00.005-04:00

Q: My parents are getting a divorce, and everything they do feels like a choice between the two of them. I know they both caused this, but everything just feels so wrong. I am really scared that they might not get an annulment. What should I do? I don't want my parents to be divorced, but I especially don't want them to be divorced and their marriage not annulled. Our family is breaking, and I can't hear what God wants for my family. Please tell me how I might be able to talk to God during this time of turmoil.

A: As children of God, it is usually best if we approach Him just as that, a child. God is all loving, all just, and all merciful; He will listen to your prayers, and though He may not do precisely what you ask for, He knows that what you are really praying for is the best possible outcome in such circumstances as the ones you are in. If we come before Him humbly and wanting to accept His will, we can pray sincerely.

Tell God of what you are feeling and of what you want for yourself and your parents. He will listen to you; you are His child.

I’ve often had periods where I can’t feel God’s presence or hear what His will is; I’m sure everyone has experienced something similar at one point or another in their lives. This isn’t a bad thing, though! In fact, it is a blessing, as Jesus tells us in John 20:29:

Jesus said to him, “Have you come to believe because you have seen me? Blessed are those who have not seen and have believed.”

Also, I would strongly recommend praying to the following saints and asking them to offer their own prayers for your family, especially your parents. St. John Francis Regis, the patron saint of marriage, St. Gengulf, the patron saint of unhappy marriages, and St. Monica, the patron saint of married women. All of these wonderful saints will be more than willing to help you and your family. The Holy Family would also be happy to pray for you; all you have to do is ask. Mary and Joseph were the holiest married couple.

If you can, I’d recommend talking to a priest – your pastor, maybe, or another priest whom you trust – and ask for his advice on the matter. Priests are here to help guide us, so I would strongly encourage you to take advantage of that. He could tell you more about the possibilities of an annulment and the process as well, along with giving you spiritual help.

I wish you and your family the best and you'll be in my prayers. God bless!

~ Rain

Twilight and Catholic Girls

2009-09-16T05:30:00.003-04:00

Today's question comes not from a fellow teen but a youth minister.

Q: I have several teens addicted to the Twilight series by Stephanie Meyers and I noticed some behavioral changes away from modesty and purity attitudes. First, I asked them to help me understand the allure of the books and the response I received was that they liked how Edward was so protective of Bella and that they were chaste until marriage. Another response I received was that the eroticism was consensual but they didn’t take it all the way so it was a lesson in self-restraint. This prompted me to do more research on the subject and to learn what I could without actually reading the books. I fear the eroticism will lead me to a near occasion of sin so I don't wish to read them myself. I am a youth minister and I fear these kids are being lead into a false sense of love and relationships through these books. Since I have recently seen pictures of one of my girls on Facebook with her name inserted into the erotic passages of the books she is reading, I have become more concerned. Do you have any suggestions?

A:

About three things I was absolutely positive. First, Edward was a vampire. Second, there was a part of him—and I didn’t know how potent that part might be—that thirsted for my blood. And third, I was unconditionally and irrevocably in love with him.
-- Bella Swan: Twilight

Being a 16-year-old girl, I myself have read the Twilight Saga: Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, and Breaking Dawn. This saga has gotten so popular; it’s to the point that if you’re a girl and haven’t read them, people wonder where you’ve been. And, I must confess, that’s one of the only reasons I continued to read the following installments after the first book—so that I wouldn’t be left out when I heard my friends talking about Edward Cullen (vampire), Bella Swan (human), and Jacob Black (werewolf), the love triangle in the Saga.

I did enjoy reading these books, though, I must say. The plot of the story— “good” vampire boy meets shy, awkward human girl—is very intriguing, and I’ve always loved vampire stories, like Dracula and The Historian. There are also a few redeeming qualities in the Saga. Stephenie Meyer, being a Mormon, did put a lot of moralistic points of view into the books, such as: saving sex till marriage, a pro-life message concerning the unborn (yes, in a saga about vampires!), and Edward’s loathing of being a monster. (In the book, Edward and his family want to be, in a sense, saved from damnation by drinking only the blood of animals, hoping that will win them salvation.)

But while reading these books, it was also very clear to me that Bella and Edward’s relationship was unnatural and unrealistic, and I must say, abusive at times. Basically, Bella is obsessive, and Edward is possessive (which, unfortunately, most girls translate into “protective”). Bella’s always raving over Edward’s body and how he’s like a “god”; Edward’s drawn to Bella’s seductive scent and her blood, and watches her every move, even to the point of watching her in her sleep. Sounds like the common, abusive relationships we have today, minus the vampire aspect, doesn’t it?

In the end, Bella’s obsession with Edward starts to look appealing over a healthy, normal relationship, and it’s a struggle to keep your mind and heart clear. That being said, I’m not surprised that Christian girls are being lead astray by these books. If I hadn’t already been enlightened by the beauty of chastity and God’s amazing role for sex and hadn’t already taken them to heart, it definitely would’ve been even harder for me to keep my focus after reading these books. (It’s hard enough in today’s culture, without reading books like Twilight!)

My advice to you would to have some sort of youth group discussion on Twilight vs. Real Love for girls (unless some guys have the guts to come, too). I’m pretty sure that all the girls would come to that (most obsessed ones take any chance to talk about Edward!). In this discussion, get their thoughts on Twilight again, why they think it’s so good, and if they would want to have a boyfriend like Edward and why. If they give their reasons, then ask how that compares to a godly relationship. Then read Corinthians 13: 4-7, and then replace ‘love’ with Edward, then with Bella. Does Edward fit? Does Bella fit? Finally, replace Jesus’ name and ask them how Edward and Bella’s relationship compares to Jesus’ love for us—the love we should be imitating in our own relationships. Get them thinking. If that part of the discussion goes well, then ask them what the faults of Twilight are. Hopefully they will realize some of them and point them out; then give your thoughts on how that contrasts with real chastity and love. Hopefully then they’ll come to realize their error in thinking, if they hadn’t already realized it.

God bless!
Catherine

Sixteen: Keep My Baby or Give Up for Adoption

2009-09-14T04:21:00.004-04:00

Q: My best friend is 16 and about 5 months pregnant. Before, she had her mind set on adoption, but now she wants to keep it. I am strongly against this because I believe it is going to ruin her life as she knows it as well as her future. I know that she needs a lot of support and someone to be there and listen to her, but I don't think I could bare to allow her to keep it. Should I intervene? And if so, how should I do it?

A: As I write this, my four year old sister and three year old brother are getting time-outs for being bad (this time it was a small fight over a toy). They are both adopted, and we have what's called "open adoptions" which means we keep in touch with their birth families (send pictures, even visit sometimes), they both come from different mothers in different cities, but in our state. Before we adopted Rose, my sister, we had a baby boy named Adam for three weeks, and then his birth mother changed her mind and we had to give him back. That was the most heart-breaking thing that I've ever been through, and probably will ever go through.

I realize this probably doesn't mean much to you, but I should tell you right now, there is no way anyone can really know what would be best for your friend and the little child inside of her. Anyone but God, that is. But I urge you to try to see both sides, especially from her point of view. This is going to be maybe the single hardest decision she will ever have to make, and she'll have to live with it for the rest of her life, whether she keeps the baby or decides to adopt.

From the adoption side, I look at my little brother and sister and can't even imagine life without them. They are the most wonderful things that have ever happened to me, even if they get on my nerves sometimes.

But from the mother's side, I look back on those three weeks my family had with Adam, and I wonder: If letting a child you love THAT much go after just three weeks is as hard as it was for me, then how hard must it be after nine months?

I can't tell you that it would be better for the mother to keep the child just as I can't tell you that giving the baby up for adoption would be any better. I don't know what kind of situation your friend is in or if it's a good environment to raise a child in or not. But I can tell you that that baby, that tiny little child, is a miracle, though it may not seem like it.

You say you're worried about your friend's life and your friend's future, but there's another person to add to the equation. We should respect and consider that life as well. I'm sure your friend was well aware that her decision to have sex could possibly result in a child, and in making that decision, she chose to take on the responsibly of her actions. Although, to be fair, there are many teenage mothers out there who have graduated high school, probably even some that have gotten through college. It all depends on how committed the mother is to a good life for both her and her child. It also matters that there are people around(family, the father, close friends) who will help her emotionally, spiritually, physically and financially as well.

What kind of goals does your friend have for her life, her future career, and possible future family? Are her parents supportive of her through this pregnancy? Where is the baby's father in all this? Can she handle the responsibility of someone twice her age? These are some very serious questions that you can ask yourself and her. The answers factor a lot in if it would be wise for her to keep the baby.

So I suppose your answer in a nutshell is this: You can try and explain these things to her and hope and pray she will make the best decision for herself and the child. But the fact remains, this child was made by God for a specific reason, and God's plan beats all in the end.

I hope you have found this helpful, please pass my congratulations on to your friend for her holy gift. My prayers are with you all.

Peace,
Martha

Christopher West: The Playboy and the Pope

2009-09-13T05:13:00.000-04:00

Leeland: Sound of Melodies

2009-09-12T04:52:00.003-04:00

To watch at YouTube: Leeland: Sound of Melodies

Has Mary Appeared on Earth

2009-09-11T05:37:00.004-04:00

Q: We have some real devout Catholic friends who are really into Marian apparitions. Do Catholics have to really believe that Mary appears on earth?

A. You don’t have to pay the least amount of attention to Marian apparitions, even the ones that the Church has proclaimed are authentic and really did happen, and still be a perfectly good Catholic. You aren’t guilty of any sin.

It's not required of you to believe in these apparitions, but it is highly encouraged you do. There is some surprisingly credible evidence that many may (and the Church teaches did) really take place. Some of the most famous Marian apparitions are: Our Lady of Guadalupe, Our Lady of the Miraculous Medal, Our Lady of Lourdes, and Our Lady of Fatima.

During the last Fatima apparition, October 13, 1917, there occurred an incredible phenomenon with 70,000 (and no, that's not a typo) witnesses present, where the sun began to whirl and dance in the sky. The sun then appeared to plunge toward the earth, and in effect vaporized all water, and moisture in the surrounding countryside. The only other thing that could have such an effect would be a nuclear bomb, and you can’t really deny what 70,000 witnesses saw, not with any logical explanation anyway.

Also keep in mind that not all Marian apparitions are authentic. There are many apparitions that the Church has not proclaimed to be genuine.

Christian

Catholic Church and Aliens

2009-09-09T05:48:00.004-04:00

Q: What does the Church teach about aliens? Could there be people on other planets?

A: There’s not really an answer for this question, because only God knows. The Church doesn’t teach anything about people on other planets. Since God can create anything, it’s certainly possible that He created people on other planets, but nobody can be sure either way.

Michael

Catholics and Angels

2009-09-07T05:32:00.001-04:00

Q: I was wondering what the Church believes about angels. Do we all really have a guardian angel?

A: Angel is Greek for messenger. The Church teaches that angels are pure spirits, and are far more intelligent than we are, and wield a great deal more power and responsibility (CCC, 330). Of course, angels are not perfect and can make wrong decisions, as shown by Satan and his followers (called demons or fallen angels) who chose to disobey God. Also there are nine different orders of angels: seraphim, cherubim, thrones, dominions, virtues, powers, principalities, archangels, and angels. And yes, we do have a guardian angel. Since the seventeenth century, the Catholic Church has celebrated guardian angels every October 2. You can even give your angel a name if you want. For example, I named my angel Sanctus. It’s not actually exactly a common name, but it stuck all the same.

Christian

Trailer: Blood Money

2009-09-06T05:34:00.000-04:00

Third Day: Revelation

2009-09-05T05:44:00.002-04:00

To watch at YouTube: Third Day: Revelation

My Mom Treats Me Like a Kid

2009-09-04T05:47:00.001-04:00

Q: My mom treats me like a kid even though I am 14. I think that she needs to loosen up. She tells me that I can’t wear certain clothes and doesn’t let me wear makeup. Should I put up with it or talk to her?

A: Fourteen is a rough age for many people. With high school comes a lot of new pressures – get good grades, have new experiences, strive for popularity. However, fourteen is also difficult for those of us watching you go through that difficult time. I remember being terrified when my sister went through middle school and into high school, because I hated the idea of seeing her make the mistakes and experience the heartbreaks that I had. Parents are the same way, especially mothers. Fourteen is an interesting age, because you are no longer a child, and yet not quite an adult – you are able to make some decisions on your own, but still rely on your parents for support. As such, you still need to respect their decisions and realize that they may disagree with you for good reasons.

My advice is to talk with your mom (in an adult-like manner, with no screaming or whining), and maybe try to come to some form of compromise over what clothes or makeup you can and cannot wear. Most importantly, listen to her and try to understand where she is coming from. Despite what we think, mothers want nothing but the best for us, so try to keep that in mind. No matter how the conversation ends up, what mom says goes (there’s that Fourth Commandment again), but hopefully by talking it over with her you’ll have a better understanding of why she won’t let you. And who knows, maybe you just might agree!

Maureen D.

Tired of Being a Nobody

2009-09-02T05:42:00.001-04:00

Q: I’m tired of being a nobody. I want to be cool and popular, but it seems that all the popular kids at school spend way too much time cutting down other people. I don’t want to be cool just by pointing out how uncool everyone else is. So, how do I get noticed without being mean?

A: To be noticed, be especially friendly and self-giving. Have other people notice that there is something different and special about you. Be a positive example, and people will naturally be attracted to you. People will crave your difference. Don’t give in to conformity. Create your own person, and your own standards. That is far more important than popularity.

Jenna

Catholic Church, Divorce, and Annulment

2009-08-31T05:29:00.000-04:00

Q: My mom and dad want to come into the Catholic Church, but the priest says they can’t until my mom gets her first marriage annulled. Is an annulment like a Catholic divorce?

A: The same situation happened with my parents. They explained to me that an annulment is when a marriage is reviewed by a Catholic tribunal to determine whether or not there was something existing when the couple got married that would make their marriage null (lacking characteristics that would make it a fully blessed marriage in the Catholic Church). Divorce is a civil action. The Catholic Church does not grant divorces. An annulment is not a Catholic divorce. In the eyes of God, you are married till death do you part. However, certain conditions could be present that would have made the marriage invalid in the eyes of the Catholic Church. Therefore an annulment could be granted, and you would be free to marry in the church again.

Ashley

Christopher West: Celibacy for the Kingdom

2009-08-30T05:17:00.000-04:00

Why Do Catholics Go to Confession

2009-08-28T04:55:00.000-04:00

Q: Why do I have to tell my sins to a priest? Why can’t I just tell Jesus myself? Isn’t it better to go straight to God with your problems?

A: In John 20:22-23, Jesus makes it clear that confession is a very important sacrament, “And when he had said this, he breathed on them, and said to them, ‘Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained.” In this verse Jesus passes on the power of forgiving sins to the Apostles, who are the first priests of the Catholic Church. It also states that He breathes on them. The only other time that God breathes on us is in Genesis 2:7 when he breathes a living soul into the first man. This emphasizes how important the sacrament is.

Also, you never have to worry about the priest telling anyone your sins because if he does then he will be excommunicated. In the Sacrament of Confession, also called Reconciliation or Penance, God forgives your sins through the priest. When you tell your sins to a priest you are actually whispering in the ear of Christ, so really you are going straight to God with your problems.

Christian

Sunday Services vs. Sunday Mass and Eucharist

2009-08-26T05:50:00.002-04:00

Q: My best friend and I like to spend the night at each other’s houses a lot. If she spends the night at my house on Saturday then she goes to church with my family on Sunday. But if I spend the night at her house on Saturday, my parents won’t let me go to church with her family because she isn’t Catholic. I don’t see what the big deal is; church is church.

A: If that is the rule, then you should respect your parents. The Protestant church service does not fulfill our Sunday obligation as Catholics. The rule around my house (because I have a lot of Protestant friends) was that I had to go to my church first, fulfill my obligation, and then I could go to my friend’s church. You should also be able to defend your faith if you are ever put into a situation at your friend’s church that would call you to.

Ashley

Mormons, Jehovah's Witnesses, and the Trinity

2009-08-24T05:37:00.002-04:00

Q: Is it true that Mormons and Jehovah's Witnesses aren’t considered Christians by the Catholic Church because they don’t believe in the Trinity the same way that we do? Why is that so important?

A: Yes, that’s true. They don’t believe in the Trinity, along with several other very important doctrines. As the Trinity and several of the other things they don’t believe in (including the Incarnation – the Christian belief that Jesus, through the power of the Holy Spirit, became human) are some of the most important doctrines in the Christian faith, they shouldn’t be considered Christians.

And not believing in the Trinity isn’t like not believing in Santa Claus. If you don’t believe that Jesus Christ is God and that He and the Holy Spirit are equal to the Father, then you’re not a Christian. Jesus Christ is where the word Christian comes from.

Michael

Making an Impression on Teachers

2009-08-21T05:17:00.003-04:00

Q: I’m going to be starting ninth grade in less than a week and I really want to make a good impression this year on my teachers. Any ideas?

A: Ninth grade, just like every new grade, is a chance to start over and start fresh. New teachers, new subjects, new classes – a whole world of new challenges to overcome. I would say the best thing to do, if you want to make a good impression, is take a look back on the past eight years of school and figure out what you did wrong, then fix it. Maybe you didn’t study hard enough in middle school, or got used to skating through English classes by reading Cliffnotes. Try setting aside time every day strictly for homework, and then stick to it! (By strictly, I mean no television or phone calls, or other distractions – just good old fashioned homework.) Actually read the books you are assigned, you may be surprised to find they’re not all half bad. Pace yourself – high school means harder classes and more work, so avoid all-nighters and late-night cramming by doing any work you can ahead of time. And most importantly, don’t be afraid to ask for help. Most teachers love having students stop by after class with questions about the reading or to ask for help studying for next week’s test. Working hard and enjoying what you’re learning are two sure tickets to making a good impression.

Maureen D.

How to Choose High School Courses

2009-07-31T05:31:00.001-04:00

Q: I have to start choosing my high school courses soon. My counselor talked to me about deciding on the path to my career. Some of my friends already know what they want to do, but I don’t. If I ask my dad he’ll just pick all the courses he wants me to take. What should I do?

A: Look through all the courses and consider the pros and cons of each class. Decide which you want to take based on what you think. Now is the time to start making important decisions by yourself. Look into what credits colleges require or recommend. See what your high school requires you to take before graduating. Or perhaps, if you have met the requirements, take a class that you have sincere interest in, or a class that might relate to your current ideas of a college major or profession. If you are having great trouble, pray and ask for guidance. Perhaps ask a close friend to help too. Have faith in the decisions that you make.

Jenna

Petty Theft and the Seventh Commandment

2009-07-22T05:38:00.003-04:00

Q: I work in an ice cream parlor part time. After hours we help ourselves to all the ice cream we want without paying. Is that really stealing? Everyone does it and our boss doesn’t pay us what we’re worth anyway.

A: Yes, that is stealing, which is against the seventh commandment.

The Catholic Church teaches that in some circumstances, you may be less responsible for a bad thing you do. For example, if you hurt someone because they’re trying to kill you, you’re less responsible for the act itself, but that doesn’t make it right. This doesn’t apply in your case – and even if it did, it still wouldn’t make it the right thing to do.

We read in the Bible, “He who is faithful in a very little is faithful also in much; and he who is dishonest in a very little is dishonest also in much.” (Lk. 16:10) This is great advice. If it is easy for you to steal ice cream today, it will be easier for you to steal big things in the future.
If you don’t think you’re getting paid what you’re worth, it would be a much better, and much more Christian idea, to get a new job than to steal from your boss.

Michael

Adam, Eve and Apes

2009-07-20T05:19:00.001-04:00

Q: Could Adam and Eve have evolved from Apes? What does the Catholic Church have to say about the theory of evolution?

A: I don’t think that Adam and Eve could not have evolved from apes because each person has their own individual soul that was especially created by God. Though Catholics say that there is a possibility that human body parts may have evolved, by God's guidance, there is no way his soul could have evolved. The soul has a unique and special creation and not in any way inherited from our parents. Pope Pius XII said that, “the teaching authority of the Church does not forbid that, in conformity with the present state of human sciences and sacred theology, research and discussions . . . take place with regard to the doctrine of evolution, in as far as it inquires into the origin of the human body as coming from pre-existent and living matter [but] the Catholic faith obliges us to hold that souls are immediately created by God” (Pius XII, Humani Generis 36). In conclusion, we, as Catholics, are to believe that whether or not the human body was created or evolved that the human soul was created.

Karen

Is Getting Buzzed a Sin

2009-07-10T05:16:00.001-04:00

Q: I learned in school that using mind-altering drugs is a mortal sin. Is it right that drinking is not a sin, but getting drunk is? If so, is getting high a mortal sin? What if I’m just getting buzzed using marijuana?

A: Drinking is not inherently an evil act. If it was, Jesus probably would have used grape juice at the Last Supper. However, getting drunk is considered a grave offense, not because of the alcohol but because of the excess. The Catechism of the Catholic Church shows that the problem with getting drunk is not in the act of drinking, but in the act of drinking too much. Gluttony is one of the seven deadly sins, and it refers to any form of excess, or extreme and unnecessary indulgence – food, alcohol, medicine, etc. Drinking in excess places you in danger of being physically harmed, as well as to the people around you. (CCC, 2290)

The Catechism also covers the use of drugs under its section on respect for health. “The use of drugs inflicts very grave damage on human health and life. Their use, except on strictly therapeutic grounds, is a grave offense. Clandestine production of and trafficking in drugs are scandalous practices. They constitute direct co-operation in evil, since they encourage people to practices gravely contrary to the moral law.” (CCC, 2291) The Catechism clearly states the Church’s recognition that mind-altering substances are an offense to our life and health, which the Catholic Church views as “gifts entrusted to us by God” (CCC, 2288). Sorry, but there seems to be no real way of getting around it – even if you are only getting buzzed.

Maureen D.

How Can I Be Free of Sin

2009-07-08T05:27:00.001-04:00

Q: How can I be free from my life of sin? I love God, but why do I always sin? I am feeling depressed because I think I am a failure. I always fail God. When I ask for forgiveness, I feel that I am just lying to God because deep inside me, I feel that I might do it again.

A: You sound like you are being very honest with yourself, and really want to change. St. Augustine said, “We hate the sin, but love it at the same time.” It’s hard to change, but you have made the first step.

Go to confession. Even if you’re not a Catholic you can go under certain conditions. You may feel nervous, or even scared to tell your sins to a priest, but that’s okay. I go almost every week and every time I’m so nervous that I have to pray for enough courage so that I don’t chicken out at the last second. Afterwards, I feel relief that I am forgiven and loved. The Sacrament of Reconciliation gives us several gifts: spiritual guidance, certainty of forgiveness, humility. It helps us to overcome self-deception in matters of sin, strengthens our self-control, and gives us special graces that will help us avoid sin in the future.

There is a really great CD you can listen to on confession, simply called Confessions by Father Larry Richards. You can receive a free copy by linking here.

Christian

God or the Girl

2009-07-06T05:17:00.001-04:00

Q: I sometimes think that God wants me to be a priest, but I am in love with a girl. Am I wrong to ignore this feeling that I should be a priest? How do I know what God wants?

A: Knowing and understanding God’s plan for your life is difficult and confusing. He often doesn’t show us what He wants for us until He is ready. Don’t ignore the calling that you feel from God. Talk to the girl that you are in love with, as difficult as this will be, and explain to her that you are going to do what God is calling you to do. She may not understand right away, but in time all things work out for the best when we listen to God and do what He wants us to do.

Tom

Do Annulments Make Children Illegitimate

2009-07-03T05:10:00.002-04:00

Q: My parents are divorced and the Church annulled their marriage. Doesn’t that make me illegitimate?

A: This does not make you illegitimate (Canon 1137). Your parents gave birth to you while they were legally married. Even though the Church no longer recognizes their marriage as sacramental, it did exist civilly. That is, their marriage did in fact take place, but it was not fully blessed due to some problem at the time they exchanged vows.

Jenna

Too Overwhelming to Read the Whole Bible

2009-07-01T05:17:00.000-04:00

Today's question has two team members answering ...

Q: How do I go about reading the Bible? It looks too overwhelming to read it all at once. What are the most important books to read? How do I start?

A1: If you just want to read the entire Bible, I’d suggest taking a few minutes every morning to read a few passages, starting with Genesis and going through the entire Old and New Testaments. (Or, of course, if you’re particularly interested in one book, you can focus on that.) You can mark down the passages you find really interesting (in a different notebook, especially if the Bible is not your own copy). When you’ve finished, you can go back and read the ones you marked or even start on rereading it. You can also look up any questions you have or words you don’t know.

A helpful book for you might be My Daily Catholic Bible edited by Paul Thigpen [Our Sunday Visitor]. It has 20-minute readings that allow you to read the whole Bible in one year.

But the easiest way to take in the entire Bible, might just be to go to daily Mass. If you go to Mass every day for three years, you’ll have heard and read the entire Bible through the daily readings (Liturgy of the Word).

Another thing I’d suggest is to find a good Catholic Bible study that can help you learn the connections between the Catechism and the Bible. I’m in one at a church in my neighborhood, and it’s really helped me to understand more about the Bible that I didn’t before.

Michael

A2: In terms of which books are more important, I found the answer in the Second Edition of the Catechism of the Catholic Church. According to the Catechism, the books of both the New Testament and the Old Testament are equally important, due to the divine inspiration that lead to their creation. Both Testaments influence one another, working together to provide God’s Truth to us. “As an old saying put it, the New Testament lies hidden in the Old and the Old Testament is unveiled in the New” (CCC, 129). However, the Catechism recognizes the Gospels as the center of the Sacred Scriptures, because Christ is their focus (CCC, 139).

The Bible is one of the oldest and most influential books of all time. It tells the story of God and of ourselves, from our creation to our salvation. It offers valuable insight into how to live a full life, be a good person, and find joy in God. There is no wrong way to read the Scriptures, so try not to worry about “doing it right” – just take your time, and enjoy it. However, if you would like some form of guidance in starting on your journey through the past, here are some tips for reading the Bible, which I have found useful in the past.

When reading the Scriptures, one logical place to start is in the beginning (no pun intended). Simply find some time, sit down, open up to page one of Genesis and start reading. If you prefer the Psalms to the Book of Genesis, start there – or Sirach, or Proverbs, or the Gospel according to Mark – which book you begin with is really inconsequential. Take it at your own pace – start with a few paragraphs at a time, or even read a chapter every day. The important part of reading the Bible is not to get through it, but to understand it and walk away with some form of knowledge you did not have before.

Remember: you are not the first person to read the Bible, so talk to your parents, friends, or priest about anything you may find interesting or disconcerting. Good luck and enjoy!

Maureen D.

What is Love

2009-06-29T05:00:00.002-04:00

Q: Everybody has probably thought about this, but I'm just gunna get it out there. What is love?

A: God is love. Every act of love is an imitation of God. What is an act of love? Love is present in every act of patience, kindness, trust, humility, generosity, selflessness, and goodness. The greatest act of love is the total giving of one's self to another. This is most clearly seen on the Eucharistic table and the wedding bed. Love is not fully tangible, beyond matter and time. Attempting to describe love in mere words is like trying to capture the glory of God in a mere painting.

Paul

Fashion and Catholic Nuns

2009-06-28T05:10:00.000-04:00

Why Does God Allow Satan to Exist

2009-06-26T05:17:00.000-04:00

Q. Why does God continue to allow Satan to exist? I know that He gave us free will, and therefore will not force us to do what is right, but why doesn't He cause Satan to become good, without taking away his free will? Or cause Satan to just cease to exist?

A. Well, for starters, He's not going to just kill off Satan. Of course He's able to, but we all know a kinder and more merciful God than that. Ah, Satan, our famous prince of darkness, our fallen angel. He chose that life, he chose to be "the evil one." He used to be one of the good guys, but then ... he wanted more. He wanted the power and control that God had. So he fell, down to a place called Hell where he could rule ... but still under the command of God. Satan still has to ask His permission before setting loose on the world. Everything Satan does, God has allowed him to do.

Take, for example, Job. One of those routine days in heaven and Satan shows up, God asks him where he has come from, and he answers that he's just been "to and fro and up and down" on earth, and God asks him if he's considered Job, "There is no one like him on earth, a blameless and upright man who fears God and turns away from evil."(Job 1:8) Then Satan challenges God by saying, "Does Job fear God for nothing? Have you not put a fence around him and his house and all that he has, on every side? You have blessed the work of his hands, and his possessions have increased in the land. But stretch out your hand now, and touch all that he has, and he will curse you to your face."(Job 1:9-11) So God gives Satan permission to "stretch his hand against" Job, but not to harm Job himself. And Satan must obey. Later on in the book of Job, God gave Satan permission to harm Job, as long as he didn't kill him. And Satan had to obey.

So really, the question is, why NOT continue to allow Satan to exist? Without the evil in this world, free will would be irrelevant, there would be no other option but good. God wants us to freely choose Him, and if there's no other option, it's not the same. And God is ultimately in control, there is absolutely nothing that Satan can do that God can't prevent if He wants to. God loves us all a great deal more than we can possibly imagine and He wouldn't put anything on us that we couldn't handle with His help.

Hope that answers your question, my prayers are with you,

Martha

Holy Fellowship of the Rings

2009-06-21T05:00:00.000-04:00

iPods and Dancing Priests

2009-06-14T05:17:00.002-04:00

Stuff to Do on Summer Break

2009-06-10T05:47:00.003-04:00

Q: I’m bored. Can you suggest anything I can do during summer break?

A: Summer break is the greatest time of the year, no school, no homework, and no teachers. It’s like a three-month-long Saturday morning, only without all of the cartoons. Unfortunately, there is such a thing as too much free time. So how do you fill those long hours of boredom? Here are just a few suggestions of things to do this summer break:

Start a club. Realize that you are not the only person looking for something to do over summer break. Why not bring your friends over and tackle boredom together? If you believe the old saying that two heads are better than one, imagine how many fun things four or five heads can come up with! But to start a club, you have to have a purpose. Maybe you could start a Random Acts of Kindness Club whose members do nice things for people in your neighborhood, like helping the older woman across the street plant flowers or walking the dog for your neighbor who broke his leg.

Get a job. Not all jobs have to be boring or involve sitting inside all day. Try working for an ice cream store, or caddying at a local golf club. Too young to get “a real job”? Don’t dismay – make up one of your own! Start a lawn mowing service, or a dog walking business. As long as your job involves something you can have fun doing, it’s a great way to spend some of that free time, while making a little money on the side.

Volunteer. Summer is the perfect time to become a volunteer in your community. Offer to help with your church’s summer Bible camp, or volunteer to work at the zoo a few times a week. See if any local day-care centers are in need of students to help out during lunch or naptime. Become a tutor for kids you know who have a difficult time with math, or reading, or spelling – something you’re lucky enough to be good at. Or volunteer to deliver flowers at the local hospital. There are tons of things for you to do over summer break – just use your imagination.

Maureen D.

Star Wars and Catholic Priests

2009-06-07T05:25:00.001-04:00

Dealing with Anger Issues

2009-06-05T05:22:00.003-04:00

Q. I have so much anger. I always seem to let it out on the people I love most. I'm trying to change but I can't. I feel so hopeless like I'm never going to be able to change who I am. I feel like I should just give up trying. Can someone help me out with this?

A. Emotions are the hardest things to control, and I find what leads to them is pride. We often take things into our own hands instead of turning our trials to God, and then we get ourselves into heaps of trouble. I am glad that you recognize what your obstacles in life are; that’s a gift, because often people are blind to the cons of their actions and emotions.

Now, getting back to the pride issue; it's fundamental to always be thinking about what you’re going to do before you do it. Before saying a word, think about it. And pray about it. When things seem unconquerable, pray to God. If we humans can't overcome our troubles, then we need divine help, and we find that in Jesus Christ. So, pray, pray, pray! Prayer creates your relationship with God, increasing your love for Him and, at the same time, for others.

Confessing your anger often will also help tremendously. Great graces can be found through going to Confession. Baring your soul in such a way causes a wonderful realization that we humans are weak, but God is there to help.

Remember that things often get worse before they get better, but perseverance and prayer, confession and trust in God will defeat all barriers of sin in our lives.

As a closing, I’d like to include two Bible verses which are two of my favorites.

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus" (Philippians 4:6-7)

“Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ's sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong.” (2 Corinthians 12:10)

God bless.
Lorraine

Catholics and Fashion

2009-06-03T05:19:00.002-04:00

Q: I normally wear a brown scapular. But I like to wear clothes from Aeropostale and Abercrombie. A lot of people tell me that it is clinging to the world and not living like Jesus. I don't wear the clothes to impress, I just like the way they fit and the way they look. What do I do?

A: Good for you for wearing a scapular! I must confess, every time I’ve tried to wear one, it would irritate me endlessly and I’d take it off after a few days. Anyway, hope I can answer your question!

Clothes have always been important, ever since Adam and Eve’s fashionable, “environmentally-friendly” fig-leaf loincloths. Fashions have come and gone throughout the ages. We all know what it’s like today. People tell us what to wear, how to wear it, why to wear it, and to not care what it’ll cost us, whether it be money or our dignity.

But what does the Bible say about it? 1 Peter 3:3-4 says, "Your adornment should not be an external one: braiding the hair, wearing gold jewelry, or dressing in fine clothes, but rather the hidden character of the heart, expressed in the imperishable beauty of a gentle and calm disposition, which is precious in the sight of God."

Mind you, that doesn’t mean you can’t dress fashionably or wear jewelry. Peter is just reminding us that the external is not what’s important—it’s your “hidden character” that’s important. If you’re dirty inside, your apparel will reflect that mindset. In the same way, if you’re holy inside, your apparel should represent it—if not, then you don’t know the meaning of true beauty and modesty.

In your case, I understand you like Aeropostale and Abercrombie—not to impress, but for the comfort. But people are judging you for it, claiming it’s too worldly. What to do? One thing they have to realize is, no matter what you wear, it was considered “worldly” at one time. Believe it or not, your grandma’s clothes were fashionable at one time—and they may come back into fashion! Even the Jews had their own clothing clique (albeit very modest).

But, on the other hand, those people may have a point, depending upon how immodest your clothes are—upon how much they attract people to your body and not your personality. For girls: really tight clothes, cleavage, and lots of skin. For boys: sleeveless shirts, extremely tight “emo” pants, and way too baggy pants, “showing off” their boxers (by the way, guys, this is not in any way attractive).

If your clothes fit one of those descriptions, do yourself a favor and get a new wardrobe (I recommend Good Will highly)! Though they will attract people to you, you have to ask yourself: what type of people do I want to attract? Do you want people who will like you for your body and choice of clothes, or people who will respect you and love your personality?

Plus, you might want to consider how Abercrombie & Fitch advertises itself. “Immodest” and “inappropriate” are understatements. Go to their website and see for yourself. Then ask yourself: do I want people to think of images like that when they look at me? Do I want to be wearing a brand that promotes itself like this? Think about it; it’s your decision.

Through all the fashions that come and go, always remember these words in Ephesians: “Put on the armor of God, that you may be able to resist on the evil day and, having done everything, to hold your ground. So stand fast with your loins girded in truth, clothed with righteousness as a breastplate, and your feet shod in readiness for the gospel of peace. In all circumstances, hold faith as a shield, to quench all (the) flaming arrows of the evil one. And take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.”

Put on the armor of God! If you wear that, you’ll awe people with your inner beauty shining forth. They’ll forget all about judging your clothes.

God Bless,
Catherine

Catholicism and Hinduism

2009-06-01T05:10:00.003-04:00

Q: My sister’s boyfriend is a great guy, nice and respectful. The problem is he is Hindu and we are Catholic. My sister really cares about him and now they're talking about getting married. I’m worried that this won't work out or that she'll decide to become a Hindu too. How do I approach this subject without hurting her feelings? What exactly is Hinduism?

A: Hinduism differs from Christianity and other Western religions in that it does not have a single founder, a specific theological system, a single system of morality, or a central religious organization. It consists of thousands of different religious groups that have evolved in India since 1500 BC. Hinduism is based on ancient scriptures known collectively as the Vedas. Hindus believe in a supreme spiritual force called Brahman with which an individual will become one after cleansing his or her karma through a cycle of birth, death, and rebirth. In life, Hindus follow the laws of dharma, or spiritual teachings.

Approach your sister with care and concern. Go into the conversation with an open heart and mind. Let her know how you feel, but also let her make her own decision. Pray for her.

Jenna

The Matrix and the Catholic Priesthood

2009-05-31T05:32:00.000-04:00

Brown Scapular and Heaven

2009-05-29T05:04:00.001-04:00

Q. My mom says that if you die while wearing the brown scapular, you will go straight to heaven. That sounds superstitious to me.

A. Only dying in a state of grace can guarantee our reaching heaven. Scapulars are not “good luck charms,” although we can attain certain graces by wearing the scapular. The Church considers wearing scapulars, like praying the rosary, to be a helpful way to cultivate a devotion to Mary. Scapulars remind the wearer, and others, that the wearer has a devotion to our Lady. Also, the scapular is a sacramental. Sacramentals are like reminders of the sacraments, holy water reminds us of baptism, and the scapular reminds us of holy orders. In 1251 our Lady appeared to St. Simon Stock and said, “Whosoever dies wearing it shall not suffer eternal fire.” That is why people believe that if you die while wearing the brown scapular, you will go to heaven. Of course, when Mary says this she assumes that one doesn’t deliberately live a sinful life.

Christian

Jehovah's Witnesses and the Trinity

2009-05-27T05:23:00.002-04:00

Q: Two Jehovah's Witnesses came to our house and referred to John 14:28b where it reads, “for the Father is greater than I.” They said that Jesus is less than the Father, so He can’t be God. Is that true?

A. I think that whenever you encounter anyone of another faith, it helps to really know the Bible. That is only a small verse in John. There is also John 5:19-30. Those verses talk about how God and his son Jesus are one and the same. Verse 26 says “For as the Father has life in himself, so he has granted the Son also to have life in himself.” So my advice is to really study the Bible and know how to properly quote verses that will help you when you encounter someone of another faith.

Ashley

Do Catholics Believe in the Rapture

2009-05-25T05:18:00.002-04:00

Q: Protestants say that Matthew 24:40 proves the rapture, but I know Catholics don't believe in the rapture. How do we Catholics interpret that Bible verse?

A: Because I'm not being very creative today, I'm going to give you a piece of context from this really great apologetics book I have ...

A Faulty Interpretation of Matthew 24:38-41
Dispensationalists teach that, in these verses, those taken away are snatched up in the secret rapture. But notice: nothing in this passage speaks of a secret rapture or coming. The context is very clear: Jesus is using these examples to emphasize the suddenness and unexpectedness of His return. These Dispensationalists are reading a secret rapture into the text; it certainly does not flow immediately from the text.

If we look at the parallel passage in Luke 17:22-37, Jesus again uses the example of the flood to emphasize the suddenness of His return. He adds another example, the destruction of Sodom. Both events illustrate the same point: the suddenness of judgment.

There is no teaching of a secret rapture here. Our Lord begins this passage by saying the day of the Son of man will be obvious: 'as the lightning flashes and lights up the sky from one side to the other'(verse 24). There's nothing secret about lightning. Jesus explicitly says that just as judgment in the time of Noah and Lot occurred without warning, 'so will it be on the day when the Son of man is revealed'(verse 30). Revealed is the opposite of hidden. This day refers to Christ's public coming and sudden judgment at the end of time. Our Lord's return will be obvious: as obvious as the flood, as obvious as the destruction of Sodom, as obvious as lightning.

Some rapture proponents try to use the events of Noah's flood and the destruction of Lot's Sodom to support their theory that the righteous are raptured while the wicked are left behind on earth. In both cases, however, the ones who were snatched away (raptured) were the wicked(Luke 17:37 adds an important detail. After Jesus declares that one man will be taken, the other left, and one woman will be taken, the other left, the disciples ask the obvious question: "Where, Lord?" Where will these people be taken? Jesus responds: "Where the body is, there the eagles [or vultures] will be gathered together." They are snatched away to a place of death, a place where carrion birds gather around carcasses. Christians definitely don't want to be snatched away in judgment). The ones who remained on earth were the righteous! This is the very opposite of rapture theory.

--Beginning Apologetics #8 "The End Times: What Catholics Believe about the Second Coming, the Rapture, Heaven, Hell, Purgatory, and Indulgences by Father Frank Chacon and Jim Burnham

Well, there you have it. I think that explains simply enough, hope it helped. I'll end with our two main scripture passages ...

"For as in those days before the flood they were eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage, until the day Noah entered the ark, and they knew nothing until the flood came and swept them all away, so too will be the coming of the Son of Man. Then two will be in the field; one will be taken and one will be left. The women will be grinding meal together; one will be taken and one will be left." --Matthew 24:38-41

"The he said to the disciples, 'The days are coming when you will long to see one of the days of the Son of Man, and you will not see it. They will say to you, "Look there!" or "Look here!" Do not go, do not set off in pursuit. For as the lightning flashes and lights up the sky from one side to the other, so will the Son of Man be in his day. But first he must endure much suffering and be rejected by this generation. Just as it was in the days of Noah, so too it will be in the days of the Son of Man. They were eating and drinking, and marrying and being given in marriage, until the day Noah entered the ark, and the flood came and destroyed all of them. Likewise, just as it was in the days of Lot: they were eating and drinking, buying and selling, planting and building, but on the day that Lot left Sodom, it rained fire and sulfur from heaven and destroyed all of them - it will be like that on the day that the Son of Man is revealed. On that day, anyone on the housetop who has belongings in the house must not come down to take them away; and likewise anyone in the field must not turn back. Remember Lot's wife. Those who try to make their life secure will lose it, but those who lose their life will keep it. I tell you, on that night there will be two in one bed; one will be taken and the other left. There will be two women grinding meal together; one will be taken and the other left.' Then they asked him, 'Where, Lord?' He said to them, 'Where the corpse is, there the vultures will gather." --Luke 17:22-37

Martha

Fr. Larry Richards: Obedience

2009-05-24T05:16:00.000-04:00

Supporting Pro-Life

2009-05-18T05:49:00.001-04:00

Q: I'm a 15 year old girl who goes to a Catholic High School. I was sitting in religion class and talking with my friend who's not Catholic. The teacher was having an open discussion and the question of abortion came up. Everyone in the class, including the teacher, was saying how we all believe abortion is morally and utterly wrong. We agreed that it is such a horrible tragedy. Well, my non-Catholic friend whispered to me, "I'm pro-choice." I was so shocked that I didn't know what to say. Caught in the moment, I quickly responded, "I'm not," and we dropped the subject. When the issue of abortion comes up in religion class, my friend always starts shaking her head and getting annoyed. I want to tell her why I'm so pro-life and why there shouldn't be abortions, but I don't know how. I've said a few things like, "Everyone should have the chance to live," etc., but ... I don't know. I always thought about doing stuff in the pro-life movement when I get older, for I'm extremely saddened by abortion, but not even being able to handle this ... I feel like I'll never be good at working for the pro-life movement. Any suggestions on what to say or do? Thanks!

A: There are two things that really help when you're talking with people about abortion: questions and education. When your friend says she's pro-choice, ask her what she thinks that means. She might not have a full understanding of what being "pro-choice" is. Ask her questions like: What are we allowing women to choose? Why should an innocent baby die because of the actions of adults? If you let your friend explain her position, maybe she will come to realize the truth on her own. The second thing you need to do is educate yourself. Learn as much as you can about abortion, so when your friends have questions, you will have answers. Also, don't be afraid to say, "I don't know". A wise person will admit to not knowing and then will spend time researching to find an answer. This is better than making something up that sounds good. There are many great websites with tons of information about abortion. Some of my favorites are: Students for Life, National Right to Life, and Abortion Facts.

Probably the best thing you can do to support the pro-life cause is to act pro-life. "Preach the Gospel always and when necessary use words." Live as a person who loves not only their own life, but the lives of everybody around them. Speak with patience and care, be a friend to those who society rejects, and most importantly, pray. Pray for those who unjustly suffer from the hands of others, and pray for the souls of those who cause the suffering.

Never allow the demon of discouragement to keep you from doing what is right. Keep the faith; know that abortion will end someday and that your help is needed.

Peace,
Paul

Fr. Larry Richards: A Story About Love

2009-05-17T05:13:00.000-04:00

I Can't Do My Penance

2009-05-11T05:23:00.003-04:00

Q. What do I do if the priest gives me a penance to do, but once I leave Confession, I realize that I can't do it?

A. First, it depends what you mean by "can't do it." If you meant you physically cannot do your penance, then I would talk to the priest who you went to for Confession. If he wasn't your parish priest, and you can't reach him, talk to your parish priest about your penance.

If you can't carry out your penance because it is difficult, then pray. If necessary , talk to your pastor, youth minister, or another strong Catholic adult that you trust for guidance. Remember, the penance part of the Sacrament of Reconciliation is important. The absolution takes away your blame for the sin, but not it's effects. Penance is meant to remedy the damage caused, and is necessary for a full Reconciliation (see Catechism of the Catholic Church 1459).

Tyler

Jason Evert: Breaking the Porn Attraction

2009-05-10T05:08:00.000-04:00

Finals, College, and the Rest of My Life

2009-05-08T05:23:00.002-04:00

Q: I am freaking out over my life. Finals are coming up and I go off to college next year. How am I supposed to know what to do with my life? What if I mess up in school and mess up my whole life?

A: Transitions in life are always somewhat frightening, so don’t feel like you are the only person who feels this way. Most people are not sure what they should be doing at this time, and there can be a lot of pressure from parents or others to go to college, or make other decisions that you are not sure about. You shouldn’t worry about messing up your whole life. Even if things go badly, there will be plenty of chances for you to take a different path. Don’t make a decision simply based on what others are telling you, try to do what you think is best for you life and what you feel God is calling you to.

On the other hand, your parents receive a lot of wisdom from God. They probably have some ideas that you don’t necessarily see the value of right now, but trust your parents and realize that they do have a pretty good idea of what is best for you.

Tom

The Difference Between Mortal and Venial Sins

2009-05-06T05:29:00.002-04:00

Q: What are some examples of mortal and venial sins? Where in the Bible does it talk about them, and what is the difference?

A: In 1 John 5: 16-17 it talks about mortal, and venial sin, “If any one sees his brother committing what is not a mortal sin, he will ask, and God will give him life for those whose sin is not mortal. There is sin that is mortal; I do not say that one is to pray for that. All wrongdoing is sin, but there is sin which is not mortal.”

The Church teaches, and this verse explains, that mortal sin destroys our relationship with God, it is potentially fatal, while venial sin being less serious wounds our relationship with God, but allows our relationship to subsist. Three things must be present to determine whether or not a sin is mortal: It must be serious, and is performed with complete knowledge and total consent. The Ten Commandments spells out for us what sins are serious.

Christian

Nose Piercing and Parents

2009-05-04T05:22:00.001-04:00

Q: I came home from the mall with a fake stick-on nose stud and my parents went ballistic. I say it is my body and if I want my nose pierced then it’s my decision to make. They say that I am disrespectful. So, what’s wrong with piercing your nose?

A: The problem here is not necessarily the act of piercing your nose. For the record, simply piercing your nose is not sinful or perhaps even against God’s will, but going against your parents’ wishes is. If your parents are against you getting your nose pierced, talk to them. Their reasons for not wanting more holes in your nose than God put there may be legitimate concerns. But before you talk to your parents, sit down and think long and hard about why you want to have your nose pierced. Body piercing is not the most pleasant experience, and there are multiple health repercussions associated with them including scarring, infection, and disease.

Regardless of your reasons and the possible risks, the bottom line is that if your parents would feel disrespected by you piercing your nose, then it’s out of the question. The Fourth Commandment states, “Honor thy father and thy mother,” so there’s no way of getting around doing what your parents want – or not doing what they don’t want. Besides, is ruining your relationship with your parents really worth a piece of metal in your nose?

Maureen D.

Jason Evert: If We're in Love, is Sex Okay

2009-05-03T05:06:00.002-04:00

Waiting for Iris: So Tonight

2009-05-02T05:18:00.000-04:00

Grandparents Living with Teens

2009-05-01T05:42:00.002-04:00

Q: My grandma is coming to live with us and I’m not too happy about it. My grandma used to be pretty cool; she always told the funniest stories. Now she is sickly and dying. It is just too hard to see her that way. It’s like she’s not even my grandma anymore. How do I deal with this?

A: Look at it as a way to be a servant, and to see Jesus. It may be hard, but like Mother Teresa said, “You can see the face of Jesus in everyone you meet.” As a teenager, it is a great humbling experience. Your grandmother is a blessing, not a burden. It is very special that your family has the opportunity to take her into your home instead of having to put her in a nursing home. Put yourself in her shoes. How would you like to be treated if you were her? Maybe you could talk to her about the things that you used to do and the fun times you used to have. Make her feel important and let her know that she means something to you.

Ashley

Church Goers Hypocrites

2009-04-29T05:38:00.001-04:00

Q: The people in our church are a bunch of hypocrites. They act like they’re all holy on Sunday, then during the week they don’t even think about God. What’s the deal with that?

A: That's how a lot of people are; sometimes it’s not on purpose. We’re all sinners. Maybe the deal is that they are not sure why they’re Catholic anymore. Maybe they think going to Mass on Sunday is enough. The thing is that you will never know. So when you see these people on the weekdays, start up a conversation about what you liked in the homily, or how you love the church community. Being a good example is important, even if they are adults. Have you ever considered that you might be doing the same thing? There is a verse in the Bible that says you should not be so concerned with what the people around you are doing wrong, rather look at yourself and fix your problems first so that you can help others better. (Mt. 7:3-5)

Amanda

What's So Bad About Cussing

2009-04-27T05:34:00.001-04:00

Q: Why is cursing so bad? If the word is used without meaning harm to anyone, then who would be offended? Also, if curse words change with the times then wouldn’t any word I use in place of a curse word be just as bad?

A: Cursing is almost always wrong because you are usually doing it in a hateful or violent way. Even doing it out of habit is not a good thing, because when you are angry you will use bad words out of hate and violence. The Bible tells us that if we can’t say anything nice, we shouldn’t say anything at all (Sir. 19:10). It also tells us to use proper language by ourselves and around others (Jas 1:19). Chapter 3 of James is a good read. It’s all about taming our tongues, as also are the chapters of 19 to 23 in Sirach.

Most of the time curse words don’t change over time, usually someone just adds a new word to use as a curse. Yes, using another word in place of a bad word is just as wrong as using the real thing, because you are doing it with meaning you’re doing it with anger. If you stubbed your toe and said “OH SHOOT!!!” that’s not bad, because you are reacting out of surprise and you’re not even saying anything wrong. But if you were angry about something and you replaced a curse with a regular word that would still be bad because you are trying to be offensive.

So the answer to your question is: cursing is wrong, even if you’re saying it without meaning. Because you know the word you are using is wrong but you are saying it anyway. And if you use a word in place of a curse word that is just as bad as a curse. But if you use a regular word when you are surprised or something like that then it is not wrong because you are not using a curse word, and because you are not using that word out of anger and offense.

Austin

Jason Evert: How Far is Too Far

2009-04-26T05:04:00.000-04:00

Wide Awake: Livestrong

2009-04-25T05:16:00.000-04:00

How Did Adam and Eve Populate the Earth

2009-04-24T05:10:00.003-04:00

Q: How did Adam and Eve populate the earth without brothers and sisters getting married? This may seem like a silly question, but it has been bugging me.

A: The Catholic Church does not side with either monogenism (an original pair of two human beings) or polygenism (more than one couple of people from the beginning of the human race). The Church does not have a stance on this because each theory does not have enough evidence to prove itself correct. This is a great mystery that will probably never be solved here on earth.

Just to explain this a little we’ll start with monogenism, if the theory of monogenism is true then Adam and Eve really were our first parents and every thing that the Bible says in the start of Genesis is completely accurate and brothers and sisters did marry each other. If the theory of polygenism is true than there were multiple couples from the beginning of our race, and the Bible just didn’t mention it so brothers and sisters didn’t marry each other. The funny thing about this is: in Genesis chapter four is the story of Cain and Abel, in this story Cain gets jealous of his brother Abel and kills him. So God banishes Cain from Eden. Now keep in mind Cain and Abel are descendants of Adam and Eve. Well, the Bible goes on to say that Cain marries a wife and has kids, and then it goes down a list of all Cain’s descendants. If you look closely at chapter four you will see that Cain was banished from Eden to the land of Nod, and married a wife in Nod. If he was banished to Nod and married a wife, where did his wife come from? Was she banished from Eden too? Did the Bible not mention every detail? This is probably the biggest part of the mystery of our origin. These reasons are part of why the Church is undecided on this. Without getting into any more detail, I’ll just say if you look at Genesis 1-6 you’ll see these little details that make our origin a mystery. So there is no positive answer to your question. Even great theologians disagree on this subject.

Austin

Where Did the Bible Come From

2009-04-22T05:03:00.000-04:00

Q: Where did the Bible come from?

A: The Bible is the Word of God written by humans inspired by the Holy Spirit over a period of almost one thousand years. God, through them, is the primary writer of the Bible, and therefore the Bible is without error. “To compose the sacred books, God chose certain men who, all the while employed them in this task, made full use of their own faculties and powers so that, though he acted in them and by them, is was as true authors that they consigned to writing whatever he wanted written, and no more.” (CCC, 106) The Old Testament was written in Hebrew, and some Aramaic and a little Greek. The New Testament was originally written in Greek. The Bible was later translated by hand, and, as the archeological discovery of the Dead Sea Scrolls indicates, are remarkably accurate.

Christian

Review: Glory

2009-04-21T05:40:00.003-04:00

Glory
Review by Natalie

During the struggle for freedom in the Civil War, the 54th Massachusetts’ regiment lead by Colonel Robert Gould Shaw are faced with prejudice as they fight to free the slaves and to maintain the union of America. Matthew Broderick, Denzel Washington, Cary Elwes and Morgan Freeman star in this passionate and powerful film. Shaw (Broderick) the determined and yet compassionate Colonel, asks his friend, Forbes (Elwes) to serve as major under his command. The two accept the position of leading the first regiment of black soldiers which became known as the “glory regiment.” (Freeman) is the courageous captain who forms the troops, the fugitive slave (Washington) is the soldier who demonstrates the true union spirit.

What I like about this movie is that it brings history to life and reminds us of the many sacrifices made by our brethren. Denzel Washington gives an excellent and very moving performance. I loved the fatherly leadership of Shaw portrayed by Matthew Broderick. Morgan Freeman and Cary Elwes give good performances as the spirited officers.

Mary's Yes

2009-04-20T05:08:00.006-04:00

Q: Was Jesus dissing his mother by calling her “Woman” in John 2:4?

A. When Jesus addresses His mother as “woman,” He wasn’t referring to her as just any woman, but thee woman. She is the woman who made it possible for heaven to be open to us by saying “yes” to God. Through her came Christ and through Him came the salvation of man. They are referred to as the “new Adam and new Eve” because unlike the first Adam and Eve who disobeyed and blocked the way to heaven, the new Adam and Eve, Jesus and Mary, were faithful to God and made the way for us. “Woman” is a special name for Mary that both God and Jesus call her, because of her special part in the plan for saving the human race.

Amanda

Jason Evert: Romance

2009-04-19T05:02:00.001-04:00

Between the Trees: The Way She Feels

2009-04-18T05:33:00.000-04:00

My Friend is Depressed

2009-04-17T05:24:00.003-04:00

Q: My friend is really depressed. How do I help her feel better? Is there something in the Bible that will help her?

A: Point out to her the positives about herself and the life God has given her. Tell her that God will provide, and help her through the hard times. A good place to look in the Bible for support is the Beatitudes. Matthew 5:3-8, “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted. Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth. Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied. Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy. Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.”

Remind her that God is always there for her and that she can turn to Him in time of need. Also, reassure her that you will be her friend until the end.

Jenna

Help Lines:

Is it Okay to be a Cafeteria Catholic

2009-04-15T05:34:00.001-04:00

Q: Can you be a Catholic and not agree with everything the Church teaches?

A: Basically, it’s just not a good idea to disagree with the teachings of the Church. The doctrines of the Church are infallible, meaning that the Church cannot err when it teaches a doctrine about faith or morals. However, it’s important to note that the Church is not infallible on matters of politics. It’s perfectly okay to disagree with, say, the Vatican’s position of diplomacy with China or Iraq, but it’s not okay to disagree that Mary was born without sin.

Michael

Christians and the Trinity

2009-04-13T05:24:00.000-04:00

Q: Why do we talk about God as father, son, and a spirit? Muslims believe in only one god. Why do Christians believe in three?

A: We don’t have three gods, but three persons in one God: the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. That is kind of hard to explain. In fact, no one on this earth knows the answer to it; the Church teaches that it is a “mystery.” Also keep in mind that in the Apostles Creed we say, “I believe in one god.” If you’re willing to do a bit of research you can find some great stuff on the Trinity in the Catechism of the Catholic Church (CCC, 232-267).

Christian

DC Talk: My Friend So Long

2009-04-11T05:01:00.000-04:00

Dealing with Leukemia and Friends

2009-04-10T05:23:00.001-04:00

Q: I have leukemia and so I can’t go to school. I have a tutor at home. My old friends don’t come over any more. My mom says that they probably don’t know if it’s all right to talk to me about my leukemia. I don’t mind talking about it because it helps me. I’m bald because of chemo and that might make them uncomfortable too. My pastor does come see me a lot and I like that.

Any ideas about what I can do to get my friends to come over and what I can do to pass the time? I’m bored a lot.

A: I know all of the answers on this blog are supposed to be answered by your peers, but I just have to answer this one myself. You see, I kind of know how you feel. When I was thirteen-years old, I had back surgery. Afterward, I was put into a body cast and bedridden for six months.

My friends were afraid to visit me for a long time. In fact, after my best friend came to visit upon my return home from the hospital, she didn’t come back. It was understandable why. I had been brought home by an ambulance, still groggy from pain medication, wearing a body cast from my chin to the top of my legs, and put into a hospital bed in the middle of my family’s living room. I was quite a sight.

When I didn’t see my girlfriend for a whole week, I gave her a call. I figured out that she must’ve felt uncomfortable around me, so I was totally upfront with her. I told her that it was okay to talk about my surgery; I didn’t mind at all. I also let her know how much I missed her company. Slowly, but surely, she started coming over more and more until she got in the habit of visiting everyday after school. After a while, she started bringing our friends from the neighborhood too.

I suggest that you call your closest friend and let him know that you would like him to come around more often. Tell him that you know that it may be uncomfortable for him at first. It’ll only take a few visits for him to get use to your appearance and to be open to talking about your leukemia. Once that happens, ask him to bring another friend now and then.

When he does come, make the visit fun. Play some games, catch up on all the latest news from school, make favorite snacks, watch a movie (something uplifting), or play video games. Let him see that you can still enjoy yourself.

One thing I remember is that my tutor only came to my house for two hours a day. This gave me a lot of free time to kill, especially considering my friends were in school more than six hours. I read a lot (which requires geeky prism glasses when you’re forced to lay flat on your back – no sitting). If you’re not a big reader, but like a good story, listen to audio books. You can borrow them free from the library.

I strongly suggest learning a new skill. If you like music, learn the guitar. If you like computer work, learn web design. Think about how cool it will be when your friends, family, or pastor come to visit and you can show off your new skill. So, think hard about what interests you and what you can learn at home.

I have to say that I believe a lot of my character was formed during my time of convalescence. I learned a lot about patience and humility. Most importantly, I learned how to appreciate the little things in life (like being able to sit and walk!). I pray that you will be well soon, and that this experience will have a lot of positive outcomes for you. God bless!

Mrs. Wittmann

Handling Racial Bigotry in School

2009-04-08T05:09:00.000-04:00

Q: This guy at school makes racist remarks every time he passes me. I can’t ignore it anymore. Is there any way to handle this guy without a big fight?

A: There are several options you can take in this situation. One option is telling a counselor at school, someone who is not going to punish the student, but who can arrange a time for the two of you to sit down and will mediate a discussion. Another option is to notify someone who may talk with the guy individually, again, a counselor, a principal, or teacher, someone who will take time and let him know that his behavior is unacceptable. Try to make sure they either say, “We have heard some inappropriate comments from you,” or “Some people have brought to our attention that…” Anything to exclude your name or part in this. You want them to allow him to know there is a problem and others are noticing the inappropriate behavior.

In addition to bringing others into the situation, like I mentioned above, you could try to be overly nice to this guy. This places you in a proactive position instead of a reactive one. I have heard multiple times that hate breeds hate. The only way to conquer hate is by love. It will be a very difficult task; it takes a big person to be kind to someone who is disrespectful. Kill him with kindness and see what happens.

Alex

Asking Jesus into Your Heart

2009-04-06T05:13:00.001-04:00

Q: A friend told me that the only way you were Christian was if you “asked Jesus into your heart.” What is my friend talking about?

A: Your friend is talking about the way he views having a personal relationship with Christ. Some Christians think that the way to become a Christian and gain salvation is by simply asking Jesus to be their personal Lord and Savior. It is true that we need to have a relationship with Christ, but we, in order to become a true Christian, need to be baptized.

Karen

John Paul the Great Catholic University in California

2009-04-05T05:09:00.006-04:00

A friend of mine visited this university looking for a school that would help her attain her dream of being a television producer someday. She was so impressed she'll be attending this fall.

John Paul the Great Catholic University is a visionary teaching institution focused on and dedicated to molding students into future innovators and creators, leaders and entrepreneurs. Students have the opportunity to acquire a deep and personal knowledge of Jesus Christ. Catholic ethical, moral, and social values provide a guiding compass for everything we do.

JP Catholic University currently offers two Bachelor of Science degree programs and with its year round structure students finish their degree program in 3 years.

Jeremy Camp: Tonight

2009-04-04T05:29:00.000-04:00

Catholics and Crucifixes

2009-04-03T05:35:00.001-04:00

Q: A Protestant friend told me that we shouldn’t have crucifixes, but bare crosses, because we are to worship Jesus risen, not Jesus crucified, and because He is no longer on the cross. What do you think of this argument?

A. When I look at a crucifix, I am reminded of what Jesus went through for me. It is humbling, and makes me think about the unconditional love He has for us. Jesus risen is a wonderful thing to reflect on, and I agree that it is very important to us as Christians, but I think that the crucifix holds a special meaning too. Therefore it is not wrong for us to have crucifixes.

Ashley

Does Atheism Make Sense

2009-04-01T05:25:00.001-04:00

Q: What do you say to somebody who tells you that he is an atheist?

A: I like an argument a guy named Blaise Pascal used. Atheism doesn’t make much sense because if you die as an atheist and it turns out that there is a God, then you could end up in hell. But if you die as a follower of God and it turns out that there is no God, you haven't lost anything. It’s not a very strong argument for believing in God if someone doesn’t already, but it is a very strong argument against atheism.

Michael

Review: Red, Innocence & Instinct

2009-03-31T05:45:00.000-04:00

Red: Innocence & Instinct
review by Lorraine

The Christian Metal band, Red, recently released their newest album, Innocence & Instinct. They take us down a road similar to that of their previous album, End of Silence, with catchy minor guitar riffs, raw and sometimes gentler vocals. Each of the songs has a deep message beneath the hard-rock exterior. Death of Me is the opening track and starts the album off at a fast, loud pace. On Never Be the Same, things slow down a bit and Red presents a more reflective song to their listeners.

And here’s my two-cents about the album: I like it equally, if not more than End of Silence, so people who are already fans of Red will not be disappointed. After I get my hands on this album, it will be one much listened to!

Bible Study Ideas for Teens

2009-03-30T05:19:00.001-04:00

Q: I want to start a Bible study discussion group at my school and need some good verses for teens. What are some of your favorites?

A: Starting a Bible study group is a wonderful idea. We can always use more of them. Some of my favorite Bible verses include: Isaiah 33:1-9 (a prayer for help to God); Matthew 6 & 7 (excellent parables and advice); Mark 12:28-34 (discusses the greatest commandment of Christ); Luke 11:27-28 (defines true happiness); Luke 33-36 (encourages one to spread God’s Truth, Love, and Church); Luke 17:1-10 (discusses topics such as sin, faith, and our duty to God).

Jenna

Christine Evans: Push

2009-03-28T05:23:00.002-04:00

Sacrifice of the Mass

2009-03-27T05:21:00.003-04:00

Q: Why do they call it the Sacrifice of the Mass? My brother says it is because it is a sacrifice to have to get up on Sunday morning to go.

A: Obviously your brother has a good sense of humor but doesn’t have a very good understanding of exactly what the Mass is.

We shouldn’t take the Mass for granted, it's very important. Maybe you could use this as an opportunity to fix that. The consecration is called the Sacrifice of the Mass because it is done in remembrance of how Jesus died on the cross for us in the ultimate sacrifice. It's also called the “un-bloody sacrifice.” The consecration is awfully important; it's when the bread and wine are transformed into the Most Precious Body and Blood of Jesus Christ.

Christian

Consecrating Oneself to Mary

2009-03-25T05:48:00.002-04:00

Q: If you've already consecrated yourself to God or Jesus, is it necessary to consecrate yourself to Mary?

A: This is a very good question; it’s one that I’ve asked too. First off, I’d like to talk about who Mary is and, more importantly, what role she played and still is playing. Mary is the Immaculate Conception; meaning she was conceived without sin. In her obedience to bear God’s Son, she became the first Christian. At Cana, she spoke to Jesus on the behalf of the newlyweds who had run out of wine. On Calvary, by giving John to Mary as her son, Jesus gave all of humanity over to her as her spiritual sons and daughters. If this were not the case, what Jesus did would make no sense. John was not an orphan, so he needed no mother in the physical sense. Notice that in both events, Mary is the helper and motherly figure to humanity.

Some would still argue that these are not good enough reasons to consecrate one’s self to Mary and say that doing so would put her on the same level as God. I would ask that you reflect on the words Mary speaks in Cana: “Do whatever He tells you.” John 2:5 Those don’t sound like the words of a woman who will try to lead us from God. By consecrating ourselves to Mary, we take the hand of Jesus’s mother and allow her to help us in our journey towards Christ.

Scott Hahn’s book Hail, Holy Queen is very informative on this subject and an excellent read! God bless!

Lorraine

Why Is There Hell

2009-03-18T05:49:00.002-04:00

Q: If God is so forgiving, why is there a hell?

A: Yes, God is very forgiving. And merciful, and loving, and caring. So much so, in fact, that He didn't want to make us do anything we didn't want to do, so He gave us free will. He wants so badly for us to go to heaven and be with Him for all eternity, but we have to choose as much and ask for His forgiveness. But because not everyone chooses the path He's made for them, He was forced to make an alternative, hell.

If you look in the Catechism, it spells it out pretty clearly; "1033 We cannot be united with God unless we freely choose to love him. But we cannot love God if we sin gravely against him, against our neighbor or against ourselves: 'He who does not love remains in death. Anyone who hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life abiding in him.'(1 John 3:14-15) Our Lord warns us that we shall be separated from him if we fail to meet the serious needs of the poor and the little ones who are his brethren. To die in mortal sin without repenting and accepting God's merciful love means remaining separated from him for ever by our own free choice. This state of definitive self-exclusion from communion with God and the blessed is called 'hell'."

Martha

How Do I Forgive Cruelty

2009-03-16T05:50:00.006-04:00

Q: How do you forgive people when they've done something really awful to you? Not the petty little jabs or mean jokes by the popular people at school, but people, adults, who have significant power over you who not only did something mean, but incredibly cruel? I've asked God to help me forgive, so many times, but I keep getting the same answer: I want you to do this on your own. How do you forgive without God's help?

A: First, God isn’t going to tell you to do anything impossible. If he is telling you to forgive someone, then it is within your ability to do so. Second, we as humans must forgive even without feeling like it. If we don’t forgive, how can we expect to be forgiven by God? It’s not an emotion to forgive, it’s a decision. It is a decision to stop wishing for a better past and let go of the hurt that a person has caused us. To forgive someone who has hurt you, you need to do just this, and continue to pray frequently for a mire forgiving spirit, as well as for those who have offended you. It is not an easy thing to do, but it is quite possible.

Another thing you can do is talk to an adult you trust, like your parents, priest, or youth minister. They may be able to give you more in-depth help on this situation and offer you support. If you've been physically or emotionally wounded by a person, you could forgive the person who injured you, but you still need healing yourself. And keep praying, God can do the more healing than anyone else can. Pray to him for healing, and be aware that it is absolutely okay to continue seeking God’s grace for this hurt.

Tyler