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A: You sound like you are being very honest with yourself, and really want to change. St. Augustine said, “We hate the sin, but love it at the same time.” It’s hard to change, but you have made the first step.
Go to confession. Even if you’re not a Catholic you can go under certain conditions. You may feel nervous, or even scared to tell your sins to a priest, but that’s okay. I go almost every week and every time I’m so nervous that I have to pray for enough courage so that I don’t chicken out at the last second. Afterwards, I feel relief that I am forgiven and loved. The Sacrament of Reconciliation gives us several gifts: spiritual guidance, certainty of forgiveness, humility. It helps us to overcome self-deception in matters of sin, strengthens our self-control, and gives us special graces that will help us avoid sin in the future.
There is a really great CD you can listen to on confession, simply called Confessions by Father Larry Richards. You can receive a free copy by linking here.
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